If you want to learn how to pick up women over 30, probably the first thing you should do is learn how to strike up a conversation anywhere and anytime.
It’s not as hard as you might think. If you get into the habit of talking to people at the grocery store, the library, the subway, you are on your way.
You can take baby steps at first. Start by saying hello to a neighbor one day. Maybe the next time you see them, make a comment or two and see how it goes.
If the conversation flows, then by all means continue on. If it lags, then move on and wait until next time. Then the next time, have a subject in mind to speak about.
There is nothing wrong with doing a little research and practice on or about a conversational subject that is proven to work.
For instance, you might want to do a little rehearsing in the shower about a conversation you’d like to strike up about Sunday’s football game, or the local mayor’s race or that strange weather you’ve been having.
Did you know that some of the most poised, seemingly confident people in the world use this technique to prepare for interactions and conversations with others? Jackie Kennedy was one of them. She was very well read on almost any subject and she would actually practice conversational topics before she met dignitaries from around the world.
People found her one of the most charming people they had ever met. She was renowned for her conversational skills. Although she made it appear effortless, it was not. She put in the time so that it appeared that way to others.
Maybe you don’t have a neighbor you run into. Practice on anyone you see on a regular basis. Maybe the door attendant in your building or the bartender or server at your favorite bar or restaurant. A coworker would be a good example of this, as well.
Be sure that during your interactions you are paying attention to how other people are reacting to what you say. Notice if they are looking away or acting bothered or bored and cut it short. It’s not always you; they could be in a hurry or have something else on their mind. Try again later or with someone else. The point is, you need to learn to be comfortable talking to anyone at any time.
Part of the key to success in this area is to truly, deep down inside, not care about what other people think. The idea is not to care and to look at your interaction as an opportunity for you to grow as a person.
If this is next to impossible for you for some reason, you should look at whether you have social anxiety and would benefit from some form of therapy. In addition, if it is really tough for you, you might consider joining a group that helps with confidence in speaking, such as Toastmasters.
If you take these steps, what you will find is that will become confident and comfortable in your speaking skills and then when you do run into the girl of your dreams, speaking to her will be no big deal. It will be just like any other day and just as easy and comfortable.